Yesterday, I talked about the need for you as a man to define a path for your life before getting entangled with a lady. Knowing what you want will help you to properly identify what help you need from the relationship and how you can impact the partner.
Experience has shown that many men marry for the wrong reasons. Your mates are getting married and you jump into the frail like there is a medal being awarded for those who get married at a certain age. People call you "settling down". If you have to marry before you are considered "settled" then you can be sure that you will be further scattered.
Today, I want to address the responsibility of the man in every relationship. A man should be a pacesetter, a vision carrier and a creative personality. Being a man is a huge responsibility. The critical aspect of being men is the fact that you are less appreciated. It is very difficult being a man and I can understand why many men hide and run away from being truly responsible but paying the price of responsibility is the best way to simplify life. More cards are sent out during Mothers' Day than any other period of the year the world over. How many men get cards on Fathers' Day? Children gravitate towards their mother because she is always available but have less bonding relationship with their fathers because he is always out in the field trying to put food on the table. Yet he is less appreciated. If you wait to be appreciated before you fulfill your destiny purpose as a man, you may wait forever. Do what you are created to do and leave the rewards in the hands of God.
The Man as a Leader
The number one duty of a man in a relationship is to chart a clear course of where his life and that of his partner is headed. A man is a leader and leaders show the way. A man must be decisive and not be wishy-washy in his ways. Decision-making is a virtue of a true man who should lead his partner. I have realized that ladies gravitate more towards men who seem to know where they are headed. Would you not rather follow someone who knows where he is going than being with someone who is always unsure of what is next?
The Provider
Men should provide for the needs of their partners. I have seen men who look out for ladies who are working and earning hot cash to marry. And such men are not lifting their own fingers to do anything worthwhile. I call them thieves! You may be offended for all I care - get a life! You are created to fend for your family especially for your partner. This does not imply meeting every want of hers - but needs. This entails doing something worthwhile for you to meet basic needs like getting a roof over her head, food on the table, basic clothing and general support. This may vary from class to class but whichever class you are found, you must live up to your responsibility. It is understood that you may not be buoyant all season-round but when you do get in the flow for cash, you should act up to your name as a provider.
The Man as a Lover
Love is the "opium" of the women-folk. They want to hear you say it to them, they want you to indulge them and by all intents and purposes they want what they call "romance" - whatever that means - find out and do their bidding as much as strength lies in you. They see their love-life as the number one issue in their lives even though they need constant education on that subject. But the issue here is to ensure that you play your role well. You can't be everything to a woman but you can be all you can be to them. The man must be knowledgeable enough to understand that ladies are 80% emotional and 20% reasonable and the reverse is the case for the men.
The Man as a Teacher & Lecturer
As a man, you must teach your partner. Ladies like people who would tell them what to do. It is therefore not right to be ignorant while you are trying to be a leader since relationship with the ladies is a call unto leadership. Be a reader, if you want to be a leader. You want a partner, but how many books have you read about ladies and relationship generally? Don't walk in assumption or with a traditional mindset. Be in the know!
This is not the last word with men but I will take a break and speak to the hearts of ladies in the next two blogs.
Let me hear from you.
Experience has shown that many men marry for the wrong reasons. Your mates are getting married and you jump into the frail like there is a medal being awarded for those who get married at a certain age. People call you "settling down". If you have to marry before you are considered "settled" then you can be sure that you will be further scattered.
Today, I want to address the responsibility of the man in every relationship. A man should be a pacesetter, a vision carrier and a creative personality. Being a man is a huge responsibility. The critical aspect of being men is the fact that you are less appreciated. It is very difficult being a man and I can understand why many men hide and run away from being truly responsible but paying the price of responsibility is the best way to simplify life. More cards are sent out during Mothers' Day than any other period of the year the world over. How many men get cards on Fathers' Day? Children gravitate towards their mother because she is always available but have less bonding relationship with their fathers because he is always out in the field trying to put food on the table. Yet he is less appreciated. If you wait to be appreciated before you fulfill your destiny purpose as a man, you may wait forever. Do what you are created to do and leave the rewards in the hands of God.
The Man as a Leader
The number one duty of a man in a relationship is to chart a clear course of where his life and that of his partner is headed. A man is a leader and leaders show the way. A man must be decisive and not be wishy-washy in his ways. Decision-making is a virtue of a true man who should lead his partner. I have realized that ladies gravitate more towards men who seem to know where they are headed. Would you not rather follow someone who knows where he is going than being with someone who is always unsure of what is next?
The Provider
Men should provide for the needs of their partners. I have seen men who look out for ladies who are working and earning hot cash to marry. And such men are not lifting their own fingers to do anything worthwhile. I call them thieves! You may be offended for all I care - get a life! You are created to fend for your family especially for your partner. This does not imply meeting every want of hers - but needs. This entails doing something worthwhile for you to meet basic needs like getting a roof over her head, food on the table, basic clothing and general support. This may vary from class to class but whichever class you are found, you must live up to your responsibility. It is understood that you may not be buoyant all season-round but when you do get in the flow for cash, you should act up to your name as a provider.
The Man as a Lover
Love is the "opium" of the women-folk. They want to hear you say it to them, they want you to indulge them and by all intents and purposes they want what they call "romance" - whatever that means - find out and do their bidding as much as strength lies in you. They see their love-life as the number one issue in their lives even though they need constant education on that subject. But the issue here is to ensure that you play your role well. You can't be everything to a woman but you can be all you can be to them. The man must be knowledgeable enough to understand that ladies are 80% emotional and 20% reasonable and the reverse is the case for the men.
The Man as a Teacher & Lecturer
As a man, you must teach your partner. Ladies like people who would tell them what to do. It is therefore not right to be ignorant while you are trying to be a leader since relationship with the ladies is a call unto leadership. Be a reader, if you want to be a leader. You want a partner, but how many books have you read about ladies and relationship generally? Don't walk in assumption or with a traditional mindset. Be in the know!
This is not the last word with men but I will take a break and speak to the hearts of ladies in the next two blogs.
Let me hear from you.
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