I want to engage my male folks in a discourse today. The focus is on the relationship side of the male vis-a-vis the male's purpose for life. Let us face it: IT IS NOT GOOD FOR A MAN TO BE ALONE. We as men want to always use that as the main reason why we seek relationships with the women but we do not carry on with a clear sense of purpose and mission. It is not enough to know that we need to have a woman to our name, but are we truly ready for what it takes for it to be successful?
Yes, it is not good for a man to be alone. But when is the man ready to be paired up? This is not only subject to marital relationships but relationships with the opposite sex generally. What need do you have that you want a relationship to meet? If you cannot define a specific need in your life for which you need a relationship, then you do not need to get another lady's life complicated. Stay alone.
Ideally, a man who is on a mission needs a lady of like passion so that together, a powerful synergy of partnership can be formed for productive and progressive success. Before you bombard me with the question of me missing out the need for filling your biological gap as a man, let me state clearly that the basic reason you need a woman is not sex. Sex is only about 20% of every man-woman relationship. If you have not figured out the larger purpose for the relationship before thinking of sex, you may crash the relationship after the first sexual encounter because for all intents and purposes, you would have fulfilled your desire.
Do you have a job? By a job I do not mean just an occupation? What I mean is simply this: Have you found a reason for your life? When you find your purpose on planet earth and you start going about getting it done, then you will need someone with whom you can partner with and get that job done because nothing of significance is ever done well alone. Therefore, your partner must be one who is on the same page with you on your purpose, passion and vision for life. This is the first consideration and it must be taken seriously so that when you go out on a date with a lady, the first criteria you have at the back of your head is: can this young woman understand my purpose in life? Where is she headed? How can my purpose help her become the best she can be? If you are able to answer those questions with positive answers, then other criteria like body curves - hips and lips, skin tone and height can follow.
No man should enter into any relationship casually. I hear about concepts like "one-night-stand". Well, that sounds like fun to a lot of people but I believe a man on a mission has no time for a stand in one night! It may decimate your life.
There are a host of other considerations that men seeking to enter into relationships must be careful to check out. This particularly applies to relationships that has lasting effect. Lets take a look at a few of such vital signs. I personally crave your indulgence to take them seriously because if I had known them a little over a decade ago when I took a dive into matrimony, I would have avoided a lot of painful experiences I have had to endure over the years.
1. Do you have a passionate desire to give to her?
2. Does the lady have an equal amount of desire to give you?
3. Does your personal achievement excite her?
4. Is she captivated by what captivates you?
5. Do you have a strong desire to impress her. You should.
6. Is she concerned enough to ask you quality questions about your purpose?
7. Does she have a mentor? Does she respect the counsel of her mentor?
8. Think twice if she has not impressed her pastor.
9. Do the two of you have a continuous improvement in the relationship?
10. Does she show deep remorse for mistakes she has made or she simply glosses over them?
The list cannot be exhaustive here but this gives a general idea of what you should focus on as criteria in your desire to get a mate.
In my next blog, I will talk about the responsibility you have towards your woman as a man. Thereafter, it will be my turn for a frank talk with ladies.
Enjoy your day.
WHY DO YOU NEED A WOMAN?
Yes, it is not good for a man to be alone. But when is the man ready to be paired up? This is not only subject to marital relationships but relationships with the opposite sex generally. What need do you have that you want a relationship to meet? If you cannot define a specific need in your life for which you need a relationship, then you do not need to get another lady's life complicated. Stay alone.
Ideally, a man who is on a mission needs a lady of like passion so that together, a powerful synergy of partnership can be formed for productive and progressive success. Before you bombard me with the question of me missing out the need for filling your biological gap as a man, let me state clearly that the basic reason you need a woman is not sex. Sex is only about 20% of every man-woman relationship. If you have not figured out the larger purpose for the relationship before thinking of sex, you may crash the relationship after the first sexual encounter because for all intents and purposes, you would have fulfilled your desire.
Do you have a job? By a job I do not mean just an occupation? What I mean is simply this: Have you found a reason for your life? When you find your purpose on planet earth and you start going about getting it done, then you will need someone with whom you can partner with and get that job done because nothing of significance is ever done well alone. Therefore, your partner must be one who is on the same page with you on your purpose, passion and vision for life. This is the first consideration and it must be taken seriously so that when you go out on a date with a lady, the first criteria you have at the back of your head is: can this young woman understand my purpose in life? Where is she headed? How can my purpose help her become the best she can be? If you are able to answer those questions with positive answers, then other criteria like body curves - hips and lips, skin tone and height can follow.
No man should enter into any relationship casually. I hear about concepts like "one-night-stand". Well, that sounds like fun to a lot of people but I believe a man on a mission has no time for a stand in one night! It may decimate your life.
There are a host of other considerations that men seeking to enter into relationships must be careful to check out. This particularly applies to relationships that has lasting effect. Lets take a look at a few of such vital signs. I personally crave your indulgence to take them seriously because if I had known them a little over a decade ago when I took a dive into matrimony, I would have avoided a lot of painful experiences I have had to endure over the years.
1. Do you have a passionate desire to give to her?
2. Does the lady have an equal amount of desire to give you?
3. Does your personal achievement excite her?
4. Is she captivated by what captivates you?
5. Do you have a strong desire to impress her. You should.
6. Is she concerned enough to ask you quality questions about your purpose?
7. Does she have a mentor? Does she respect the counsel of her mentor?
8. Think twice if she has not impressed her pastor.
9. Do the two of you have a continuous improvement in the relationship?
10. Does she show deep remorse for mistakes she has made or she simply glosses over them?
The list cannot be exhaustive here but this gives a general idea of what you should focus on as criteria in your desire to get a mate.
In my next blog, I will talk about the responsibility you have towards your woman as a man. Thereafter, it will be my turn for a frank talk with ladies.
Enjoy your day.
No comments:
Post a Comment